Hand-baked and prepared with love

It seems you can no longer leave a pet store without passing by a delightful array of gourmet treats.  I would like to meet the person that decided this was necessary.  Survey your average dog as an example.  You will find that they eat:

Why someone decided your pooch needed "delectable" gourmet treats is beyond me.  With that in mind, allow me to share two reasons gourmet dog treats are not a good idea.

1. They can be very confusing. It looks like a chocolate chip cookie. It smells like a chocolate chip cookie... But it does not taste like a chocolate chip cookie. I speak from personal experience. Eating a gourmet dog cookie tastes exactly like it sounds. (And if you thought it "sounds like" eating dog food infused with the sent of home-baked goodies, you are right.)

2. Any time I want to eat a real chocolate chip cookie, cdog now goes into a state of near frenzied panic. This state continues until shifting to a look of perturbed incredulity as he watches every last bit of that tasty morsel - what should have been his tasty morsel - disappear into my belly. The next 30 minutes become a consistent effort of me reinforcing the idea that cdog is not to retrieve the missing cookie by sending his nose on a search-and-rescue mission into my mouth.

(hungry cdog is shared by a creative commons license [CC-BY-NC-ND-3.0]; checklist images via wpclipart.com)


  1. mmm...yes...advertising ploys for animals. it's not just for kids anymore.

  2. What's awful about it is that when we're not buying dogs gourmet treats, we're teaching them not to beg and keeping them away from people food.
    To me it's like giving a kid candy flavored medicine. Dog food shouldn't look like people food and medicine oughtn't be yummy.

  3. No kidding. It's like Mitch said, if they really wanted me to eat just two Advil, they shouldn't of put that yummy candy coating on it. It's delicious, no thank you, I'll have a handful. :)

  4. emmerube, I'm still waiting for them to add a "scent" to televisions, so that way when a dog smells that yummy advertised treat in the store, they can start begging right away!

  5. You could put crap on a cracker and a dog would eat it if you presented it in a high pitched Valley Girl voice (so would most children, but I digress.)

    Even though I love my dog and am amused when people put clothes on their "furry babies," I refuse to subject my dog to this practice. As such, he eats dog treats--nothing I would be tempted to consume myself. (This could be because I'm not good at sharing food and refuse to pay $2 for a doggie brownie.)

  6. "Why someone decided your pooch needed 'delectable' gourmet treats is beyond me."

    I think it's because someone just figured out a way to make money off the fact that people who work all day feel guilty about leaving their dogs. And no! I'm totally not cynical at all. Why do you ask?

  7. Jill, I never would have thought you were! ;)

    Have you noticed they adopt the "selling crack" method of advertisement, too? They give out a few free samples in a bin by the register. Get your puppy hooked. Watch him drool for more next time you bring him in. All of a sudden liver treats just aren't good enough. Gotta be gourmet. Those suckers are probably raking in a fortune.

  8. >> Abby said: "You could put crap on a cracker and a dog would eat it if you presented it in a high pitched Valley Girl voice (so would most children, but I digress.)"

    What is it with high-pitched voices that dogs just love? Our friend's trainer swears by it. I refuse. For what it's worth, cdog thinks "crap on a cracker" sounds like an excellent treat. Throw in a worm and it'd be like "puppy smores"!

  9. Dogs eat teddy bears?
    What do teddy bears eat?

  10. Ha! do they ever eat teddy bears! That cute little pooch in the pitcure up there can tear through a stuffed animal in mere minutes. I will note that they don't digest them very well... yuck. (I wondered if anyone would find that odd :)

    What do teddy bears eat? After careful observation, I have concluded they have a diet that exists exclusively of cotton balls...

  11. How do I love that top image? Let me count the ways!

    Actually, imma skip the counting. Let's just call it "a lot" of ways.

    I used to work next to a dog bakery. I'm no less perplexed by them now than I was then, the better part of a decade ago. Like your second reason, I'd buy these no more than I'd buy a dog toy shaped like a human shoe. Why again do I want my dog gnawing on shoes? Hmm . . .

  12. They do look tasty don't they? This makes me wonder if dog bakeries smell as good as regular bakeries...

  13. None more true! I recently dog-sat for two Bernese Mt Dog puppies, and during the course of one day they managed to try to eat: 1) deer poop; 2) horse poop; 3) aluminum foil; 4) Styrofoam; 5) napkins; 6) a hair brush.

    Clearly, dogs aren't discriminating unless people make it their mission to coddle them... What dog is born thinking they should be carried around in a $500 Louis Vuitton purse while snacking on an organic flaxseed cookie?

    Oh, people.

  14. I can fit my cat's head in my mouth, but I think a dog's head might be more than I can handle. No cookies for me, clearly.

  15. Elly, it is much less pleasant than you would think. Especially when his face smells like stale milk due to... I honestly have no idea what that is due too :)

    @Mybloginyoureye- For a minute there I thought somebody had kidnapped my dog. Then I saw "Bernese Mt Dog" and breathed a sigh of disgust... er, no, I mean relief. Definitely relief.

    And how many purses did that 500 bucks buy? Surely not just one.

  16. I never get free samples of crack when I buy pet food!!!!!!!!

    It must be because I mostly pick it up when I shop for household stuff at Target...

  17. Ah, you've not shopped for pet food 'till you've done it with your pet at the local "Super Generic World of Pet Stuff" department store. They have everything from delux pooper scoopers to little mice that cdog is sure would make an even more excellent "gourmet treat".


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